The Byron Katie quote on understanding that keeps me on my toes

When I was studying to become a Physical Therapist they taught us that communication between two people follows a simple sequence.

The sender follows “idea-encode-transmit”. So you think of an idea, put it in a structured sentence and blurt it out.

Then the receiver follows “receive-decode-feedback”. Which basically means that you hear something, think about what the meaning of the words is and create your own idea about that meaning.

Which leads you back to “idea-encode-transmit”, aka you respond and so it goes on. (and on and on…)

But! There doesn’t have to be any correlation between the senders encoded idea and the receivers decoded idea. Because decoding a message happens in the context of a persons experience.

So when I say “Isn’t that a lovely girl?” and yesterday she snubbed you and you dislike her, you can interpret my message in a number of ways. Maybe I’m being sarcastic, maybe I’m just commenting on her dress… So now we have static.

How can we prevent this static?

By keeping on our toes during a conversation and constantly checking to see if we’re still on the same page. And maybe even asking if we understood correctly.

Does this make life unpredictable? yes.

But maybe it already is…

The Martha Beck quote on helplessness that keeps me strong

And it’s just so darn tempting, because it feels so safe.

If I don’t take any risks, I won’t get hurt.

If I follow the rules, they’ll approve of me.

If I ask for help nicely, they’ll think I’m a good girl.

But you know what? I’d rather be  a strong girl…

Want to relax more? These 4 must-haves for your kitchen will help

So to cap it all off, here’s my evening routine to guarantee my lovely me-time mornings:

After dinner, I load my dishwasher and make sure I run it at night. All surfaces get a wipe and I lay out a fresh dishcloth for use in the morning.
I vacuum and wet clean my kitchen floor and any other floor that needs it so I don’t get any crumbs between my toes.
I program my coffee maker so I’m greeted by the welcoming smell of coffee when I step into my kitchen in the morning.
The rest of the evening is me-time, no more chores now!

Then my morning routine is designed to set me up for a relaxed day:

I wake up and I take my coffee with me into the garden for some journalling and day-planning. Nothing fancy, just so I know what’s in store for me this day.
When I’m ready I fill my slow cooker so dinner is ready when I come home from work.
I wake the kids and we all have breakfast together in the kitchen. We all make our own lunch so the kids learn to do things for themselves.
We all get ready for school and work together so the older kids can help the younger one and I’m right there to answer all the questions. No yelling “Mohooom” from one side of the house to the other!
Hope this post helps you to come up with a balanced routine of your own. A bit of housework, a bit of kids time and a bit of me-time combined helps me to juggle all the different balls at once.