And you just got permission to be totally yourself!
Hi, I am Carlijn!
Loving that pink porcelain elephant you brought with you from Thailand when backpacking pre-kids but afraid to embarrass your teenagers?
Put it on the mantle piece. That’s right, smack dab in the middle!
Hating your job but you can’t bring yourself to ask the kids to give up one of many after school activities to create a bit of financial room so you can quit and take time to figure things out?
Have a family meeting this Sunday and ask their help. Brainstorm, think outside the box and don’t leave the room until you got some help!
There will always be a million reasons something can’t be:
The kids are too young, hubby works a shift on a Saturday evening, mount Washmore trumps mount Rushmore or you’re just plain old tired.
But if you don’t choose yourself, you’ll live a life of regrets.
Nobody’ll remember you didn’t attend your high school reunion because your sister needed a babysitter and little Johnny loves playing with his big nieces and nephews.
But you‘ll remember!
So from now on, every second of your life, you better remember this:
How did I get to this point? Let me tell you my story…
When I became a mother eight years ago, I never could’ve imagined being angry with my beautiful little girl or loosing my patience. Like all new mothers, I needed only to gaze into her eyes to melt and drop everything.
Fast forward a couple of years and the reality of being home alone and caring for three small children left me drained.
I had these mysterious health issues the doctors coulnd’t find a reason for which. In hindsight they were all caused by lack of sleep and inadequate nutrion while breastfeeding. Sounds stupid to me now .
And on top of it all, I had become so used to putting my little ones needs before my own that I had lost my sense of self. I constantly felt put upon by my hubby and kids and when someone wanted to help (like take the kids for a day or help with chores) I didn’t know what to do with my time. So I cleaned my house or got lost in my facebook feed. It wasn’t pretty.
Th turning point came when I tried to get back to my job as a physical therapist and realized that I didn’t want to spend my days with people not as committed to their health as I had been. All I could see was that “they” wanted a quick fix without doing the exercises or changing their life-habits.
That’s when I started to question wether I myself was as committed as I thought I was.
Always complaining and never putting in the effort to change wasn’t getting me anywhere.
I didn’t exactly “hit rock bottom”like they say but I kind of looked around me and found myself at the bottom of the gorge. Beautifull scenery (my husband and children) but no far-seeing vista and no way of changing my viewloint to look at things a different way.
That’s when I started to put my problem-solving skills to work on myself. I had always worked with clients from a practical perspective. When your back hurts, I’m not one to teach you the “perfect posture” or “correct way of lifting stuff”. There’s a time and place for that, sure, but I always gained a much faster result by analyzing the pain-inducing daily activitites and changing them up just a tad. Always adapting those daily activities for gaining strength and improving muscle control.
So I started to adapt my own daily activities. Simple things like changing our kitchen seating arrangement so I had the sun in my eyes in the morning. This helped me enormously with my morning grump and winter dip.
I started to work on a weekly schedule and themed my days by the batched tasks I wanted to do. I changed up my wardrobe and created a uniform for household days, blogging days and social days.
I never found my “one thing” like meditating every day (I only meditate when I’m totally alone in the house) or journaling everyday (I only journal when I feel the need and I never read back what I’ve written).
For me, the point isn’t to be consistent or to crteate a habit.
For me, consistency is for parenting and habits are for housework.
I’m a grown woman, with ups and downs and different needs from moment to moment.
I needed a toolkit support myself during those ups and downs.
I needed to learn how to create ease in my day and make my days flow smoothly. I needed to learn how to give myself grace and how to stop that nagging voice in my head.
But most of all, I needed to learn who I was at this time in my life and how I could regain my sense of self. What are my needs and how am I gonna combine taking care of me with taking care of my family? How am I gonna prevent myself from forgetting to take care of me in the rush of the day?
So that’s my story and I’ll share with you my choices for creating a life of simplicity and ease while adding more me to my life.
May it help you to also add more you to your life!